He told me they were just razor bumps!
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
