hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
