...so i touched it.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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