i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
