I want to stick my p in your. b.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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