dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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