I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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