Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
