My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
