I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Randomize
