Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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