she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
