one two three fourrrrnication!
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
How external is "for external use only"?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
