did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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