it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
