I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
