I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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