would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I wish I only lived at night.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize