Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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