well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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