Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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