he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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