I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
