would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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