I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
