Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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