She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Randomize
