nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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