420 ftw
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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