I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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