do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
