I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
its liver damage thursday
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
