I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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