tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
