and she was petting her beer can
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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