She's JV to your varsity
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
