I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
