you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
