you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
