Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I think your dad took our porno
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
