why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
