I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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