I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
