so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
