the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize