I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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