the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I lost the right to judge tonight
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
