I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize