Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize