It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Someone shit on the floor
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
