I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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